


you're a wizard (niall)!

by postmoderne



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Wizards, Assistant!Harry, Fluff, Love, M/M, Wizard!Niall, a sassy cat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-25
Updated: 2015-04-25
Packaged: 2018-03-25 18:20:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3820234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/postmoderne/pseuds/postmoderne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>idea from: </p>
<p>fic where niall is a wizard and harry is his glamorous but utterly useless assistant who also happens to be completely and irrevocably in love with him and niall doesn’t know it but it just so happens the only reason he hired harry in the first place is because he’s completely and irrevocably in love with him too and there’s lots of mishaps with potions and alchemy and harry’s hair colour and a cat called ptolemy</p>
            </blockquote>





	you're a wizard (niall)!

niall is absolutely not impressed.

"but it's gonna look so cute on you, niall!", his pretty assistant with the lucious curly brown hair and the sparkly eyes pouts and continues to hold up the midnight blue cloak with the embroidered silver stars and the matching pointy hat. all it looks would be utterly ridiculous and not in any way cute, if you ask niall, but unfortunately no one's ever asking him. at least his pretty assistant harry isn't.   
"i am not bloody merlin, harold", niall grumbles and smoothes down his very acceptable lab smock, which he thinks to be very professional and also very much more practical than a wizardly cloak, really. he can't be mad at harry, though, he just hasn't it in him to frown at his useless assistant for more than three and a half minutes. he counted the time once, when he tried to stay angry at harry for no less than a week. then harry did something adorably stupid (again) and niall's resolutions crumbled into dust (again). 

"but you are a wizard!", harry points out and throws the wizardly cloak over his shoulder, puts the ridiculous hat on his own head and oh wonder, it actually looks ridiculous! niall sighs loudly. it's endearing nonetheless and he swears to all the famous magicians out there, this boy will certainly be the death of him.   
"i am, but this is the 21st century and i don't think i need this--"

"exactly because it's the 21st century you need this!", harry interrupts him, swooshes behind him and pulls the giant blue cloak over a startled niall's blond head. "don't struggle against fashion!"  
"i'm not-- ugh! i'm not struggling against fashion, i'm - would you stop it? - struggling against a obstreperous assistant!", niall shouts and tries to flee harry's big, warm hands and the never-ending cloth and curses the brunette's superiority. he could cast a spell, sure he could, but he's too caught up with harry's hands suddenly touching his bum to even form one comprehensible word in his mind.   
"by all means, har-!", niall squirms free of his assistant's manhandling measures and promptly flopping on the formerly touched buttocks, the cloak landing in a heap on top of him. "you're the worst. why did i ever hire you?"  
harry, still with the pointy hat on his head, crosses his arms and looks down at niall with one raised eyebrow. "because i am a darling and you needed someone to keep your magical laboratory clean."  
niall groans and lays completely onto the floor, putting his feet up, groaning some more. 

"i don't know what you understand under 'keeping my laboratory clean', but have you looked around here?", he asks harry and points around in a circle. "this is not clean!"  
his assistant only huffs and eyes the benches and tables full of glasses filled with fluids of all sorts of colours and the gemstones and jewels and herbs. and mostly; the papers and little notes flying around.  
"yesterday i watered those plants over there", he says sulkily, steps over niall's laying body and walks towards the green growth, that might be a cactus of some sort, narrowing his eyes at the thing.   
"it looks as if it's breathing, honestly, creeps me out."

"it looks as if because it is, in fact, breathing.", niall explains from his position on the ground, which might not be at all hygienic, when he thinks about it. he jumps up to his feet. "i call it 'planta spirare' which translates to 'breathing plant' but i've never had latin, so the conjugation might be wrong. i googled it, actually."  
harry turns around and frowns at him. "and what is a breathing plant good for?"

"uhm.", niall bites his cheek and shrugs then. "don't know, if i'm honest. it just doesn't produce oxygen anymore, but rather breathes like humans do it.", he stills for a moment. "it might die very soon, probably."  
now the blond man looks rather upset as the trots over to his breathing plant and crouches down to it. "sorry plant. i magicked you into something you're not. i mean you do breathe, as a normal plant, but differently. i'm sorry.", he tells the plant and puts his hand on top of it, mumbling a few words and the cactus' plant chest stops moving back and forth.   
"well done, niall. do you want a cuppa tea?", harry asks and throws an arm around the tiny wizard. "it's gonna make you feel better, yeah?"  
niall turns his head and smiles at his assistant. "yeah, thanks, harry. this is what i pay you for."

"you don't pay me at all, unfortunately.", harry smiles back and places the sparkly hat onto niall's head now, finally, at last.   
"and you know exactly why i don't pay you, don't you?", niall smiles. harry replies his smile, his grip around niall getting a little tighter.   
"yes, i do know why.", he smiles and niall smiles, too.   
"good to know that we're on the same level there, sweetie.", niall smiles brightly and stabs a finger into harry's ribs, who winces and lets go of the blond. 

"don't you sweetie me, sugarplum, or you're not getting any tea."  
"why do you keep forgetting that i could easily magick myself all the stuff, sweetie?"  
"because you never do, you always bother me. sugarplum."  
"that is a lie."  
"is not!"  
"is, too!"  
"harry!"  
"niall!"

\- 

"that potion doesn't seem right to me, mister niall.", the reddish cat comments snarkily and mews just as the wizard pours absinth into the bubbling liquid in front of him. he glares at the animal.   
"what do you know, kitty?", he grunts and pours some more absinth into the vessel on the stove. "tell me again... why are you even able to talk?"  
"i accidentally sipped on your 'make cats talk' potion, tsk. you've got the memory of a goldfish.", the cat replies sarcastically and hops onto the counter next to niall, knocking over jars of mud and a bottle of what seems to be strawberry juice but is probably not. 

"oh, for merlin's sake, ptolemy!", niall exclaims, grabs the cat and lets him fall onto the floor. "i thought cats were so elegant and velved pawed?! look at this mess!"  
"did someone say mess?", harry pipes up as he enters niall's laboratory. "harry to the rescue!"  
"no, nonono! stop right there! no harry to the rescue!", niall fiddles with his hands at a confused looking harry, who picks up a hissing cat. "aw, ptolemy, what did the evil sorcerer do?"  
"the evil sorcerer didn't do anything but receive criticism and then the bloody cat destroyed presumably important ingredients of... potions!", niall shouts and runs frustrated hands through his hair. "why is that creature even able to talk?!"  
harry hugs ptolemy tighter to his body and the cat really dares to start purring loudly. "he was a birthday present... from you. three years ago. did you forget?"

"oh"

"yeah. oh.", harry spits and runs out of the laboratory, almost colliding with the door.   
niall sighs in self-pity. "fuck, fuck, fuck!", he wails and falls to his knees, pressing his forehead against the white counter. "fucking fuck."  
he knows he should apologise, even though he's not sure what for, because this now was definitely the cat's fault. the blond moans and facepalms himself. "i can't blame a stupid cat, for god's sake!"  
he realises belatedly, that his potion boils over and runs in one bright green foam down the stove. "FUCK!"  
\- 

"listen here, you poor excuse for a cat", he snarls and threatens the animal with a lifted finger. "you do what i say or otherwise your ability to express yourself will vanish into the dark nothing, understood?"  
ptolemy slow-blinks at the blond wizard and meows. 

"you are by far the most useless spell i've ever cast. but you make harry happy, therefore i'll have to bear with you. whatever now. i know harry is angry at me and while you are the main reason because of that, i will not hold a grudge against you, alright?"  
the cat meows again and it sounds so annoyingly nonchalant, that the only wish niall has at the moment, is to throw the thing out of the window, but he isn't that cruel. and the thing would probably survive that.   
"okay, here's my request: please do me the favour and tell harry to come to the old witch's cauldron's tree at nine pm tonight, okay? until then, i'll be in my laboratory. i do not want to be disturbed!"  
ptolemy mewls and jumps off his seat in niall's kitchen and leaves. niall takes that as a yes. if not, well, then he's kind of screwed. he can't believe he's trusting a bloody cat with this and he can't believe he's so in love with his no good assistant. he hired harry, because harry was pretty and still is pretty, with his dimples and his blinding smile and his dumb curls and lanky limbs and sometimes niall can't help but groan the whole day. 

harry never cleans, harry doesn't know when to not come into niall's laboratory, because he's trying to create gold at the moment, thank you very much, he's plenty busy, and harry is as clumsy as any human could ever be, harry gets confused so easily, harry always forgets the valerian he's supposed to buy, or the dock, but he never forgets the camomile because he likes to make camomile tea and he always leaves a cuppa on niall's lab desk and he always gives niall the mug with the smiling bunny because harry thinks that the bun looks just like niall and it's awful with harry.   
he wants to kiss and smother the curly-haired assistant at the same time. he's got it bad for him and he usually doesn't see the point in bunnies of any sort, but he probably doesn't treasure anything more than this goddamn smiling bunny mug from harry.   
sometimes he just hates everything. 

-

niall still remembers the day when he accidentally dyed harry's hair a nice piercing pink. to be fair, it was less niall's fault and more harry's, because that bloke is a klutz, a total klutz with two left feet, who continuously trips over thin air, especially in niall's laboratory where he should clean, actually, but doesn't and it's frustratingly adorable. 

the wizard remembers harry skipping through the door, hands full with every kind of colourful flower but probably not the flowers niall needed, humming a little happy song.   
"here's what you wanted, sugarplum! and i bought one rose extra for you!", he cheered and was about to hand the flowers over, when he, naturally, tripped over his own feet and fell onto niall, who was currently cooling off a potion he just created.   
it happened because it had to happen. they both landed on the floor (which isn't quite unusual for them) and niall poured the pink potion all over harry and his dark-brown curls and his very own shirt.   
at first, nothing happened and while niall didn't expect anything to happen, he was still surprised, looking at harry in deep wonder, then he stared at the empty bowl in his hand. 

"well, hello there, butterfingers.", he said and grinned at harry, who grimaced, trying to wipe the pink liquid off him.   
"please say this isn't poisonous", harry uttered and got off the blond, sitting back on his heels. 

"it's not, fortunately", niall smiled and shrugged. "just a love potion for ducks"  
"ducks?", harry frowned and started to gather up the scattered flowers, avoiding the puddle of pink on the floor. niall nodded.   
"was an experiment. our neighbour told me she tried to get her ducks to, you know, but they don't and i wanted to help her and-- oh--!"

"what's oh?"

"oh, uhm... your. hair?", niall stuttered and his eyes widened. "and maybe your face? a little? unnatural?"  
"what do you mean, unnatural?", harry asked in a high-pitched voice, grabbing his hair with his hands, pulling it in every direction. "is it-- is it?"  
"pink? yeah. kind of?", niall stood up awkwardly and coughed. "uhm, it suits you, though"  
"hm", harry hmmed and looked at the flowers in his arm, blushing, which was even visible through is current face colour. "would you let me meet your parents like this?"  
the blond stared at him and blinked bewildered. "eh? yes, why not?"

"great!", harry giggles with his still dripping hair and slightly pink face. "let's meet your parents, then!", he proclaimed and threw himself at niall, kissing his cheek.   
"are you sure you didn't catch some of the love potion with your tongue?", niall questioned warily and shoved his curly-haired assistant away. "you smell good, though. maybe i should sell the love potion as hair dye and perfume in one"  
harry grinned at him doe-eyed and pushed a stray curl out of his eyes. "but we're going to meet your parents, right?"

"you've clearly got no shame, styles, but alright. if you want?", and of course harry wanted, what else was there to be expected? this was how harry met bobby and maura horan for the first time; pink and giddy, a little too clumsy to be attractively tall, kissing them on their cheeks three times and congratulating them on their magical son, before he went back to hold niall's hand for the entire visit.   
niall knew back then and still knows, that he's in this too deep to go back and frankly, he doesn't want it to be any different than it is. 

-

it is nine pm and niall's laying underneath the witch's cauldron's tree and waits for harry. he's spent all of his day in his laboratory, preparing this gigantic apology for his pretty (pretty useless) assistant and just hopes that ptolemy, the cat straight out of hell, did as he was told.   
niall sighs and pities himself and his fate for a whole of five minutes and begs dumbledore twice to make harry come to the tree and forgive him (and maybe also kiss him).   
"you know", a deep voice resounds and niall sits up quickly. "when ptolemy said i should come to the tree tonight, i didn't quite expect you to just lay there like a giant baby"  
"am not a giant baby!", niall instantly complains and just so stops himself from pouting. "harry..."

harry steps closer and smiles down at him. "i'm not mad at you. i don't even know if i should be... or not?"  
niall smiles, too. "you shouldn't, but i--", he doesn't say anything more and just lifts his hand up and waves it briefly, sparks forming around his fingers. harry's eyes follow niall's hand and they light up.   
"that's amazing, niall", he breathes and lays down next to the blond wizard. "pure magic"

niall chuckles and grasps harry's hand, taking it in his own. "did it for you, took me several attempts"  
it's dark already when they both stare up into the leaves of the tree, watch magically fabricated roses glow red and pink and purple growing on the branches of the tree like apples maybe.   
"the pink roses remember me of your hair", niall admits and turns his face towards harry, who looks so soft in this faint light, so kissable. "i liked your pink hair"  
"so did your mum", harry replies without missing a beat. niall groans. "must run in the family"  
niall sighs. "uhm, so, what we're here for now... harry. i am sorry for--"

"no, no. it's okay. it really is. i know you don't like ptolemy and i know you're always very busy... and i know that i always screw things up. i'm sorry"  
"how about... how about none of us are sorry and we just are... friends again?", niall suggests and squeezes harry's hand. friends who kiss sometimes perhaps, he adds in thought.   
"yes, that'd be great", harry tells him with a grin and slides closer, huddling into niall's side, pressing his nose and lips into the hollow of his neck.   
niall shivers lightly and doesn't know how to breathe anymore. "harry..."

"i love you, you know?", harry whispers and hot air hits niall's throat. "it's why i keep up with you"  
the sorcerer is sure his heart stops beating for a second. "i-- i love you, too", a pause; then: "and who's keeping up with whom here?"  
"obviously i am keeping up with you, sugarplum", harry says determinedly and rolls on top of the smaller lad, who huffs loudly.  
"i beg to differ, sweetie!"  
"oh no! way to ruin a romantic moment, sugarplum!"  
"it's entirely your fault, sweetie!"  
"is not!"  
"is too!"  
"niall!"  
"harry!"

-  
the next time harry fails to clean up niall's lab and the wizard gets angry at him, harry just kisses it better and maybe niall can forget about harry being utterly useless as an assistant (for once).   
-

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed!  
> Sorry for any mistakes. x


End file.
